Friday, July 24, 2009

Buzz, Buzz, Buzz . . . I Wonder What She Does

Woke up fine yesterday, but then something happened to my back while I was watching the Tour de France time trials and PRESTO CHANGO! I was a real nasty bear with some sort of muscular spasm event happening right over my left kidney for the rest of the day.

Probably all the bad karma I accumulated by making orphan jokes.

(Guess I probably shouldn't implicate my mother by ratting her out for threatening my brother with the gypsies when he misbehaved as a child.)

But I digress.

I tried lying on the floor with my knees bent and a Stephanie Plum novel to distract me. But that didn't help.

I applied gin, orally. No better.

Finally, my sister-in-law stopped by after work and brought me a patch with something in it that I applied to the bad spot.

That worked.

Today I feel as thought I have been punched there. That is, a bit tender. But the knot/spasm is gone. I even went to Pilates.

What remains is a weird buzz. I'm loopy, but at the same time I feel as though I've consumed an entire colada of Cuban coffee by myself.

I was motivated enough to prune part of the hedge that always smacks me in the face when I try to walk into the back yard through the gate. And I pulled lots and lots of weeds.

Before losing total interest.

I'll offer the children some money in exchange for picking up my mess and putting it in a trash can.

Now I really need a shower, but the Very Hot Roof Repair Guy is here, and I don't want to be a cliche. Or a scene out of a very bad adult movie. He's only putting up a bit more of the scaffolding and then I think he'll be gone and it will be safe to take a shower without risk of having to answer the door while wrapped in a towel.

It's bad enough the neighborhood has no doubt labelled me as "That lush who is always walking around with a drink in her hand!"

"In her pajamas."

Okay, VHRG just drove off. The coast is clear.


valentina said...

WEll maybe he'll return tomorrow and you'll have another opportunity to appear en dishabille! HA! Glad your back is better! xov

Tina in CT said...

I need the VHRG at my house as I have major roof problems.

Think of what you had with your back and make it so that it feels like you're being repeatedly stabbed with a dagger. That's how my lower back/upper rump felt the day I went to the ER by ambulance. The insurance statement came and that little ride is going to cost me over $500 copay for the ride and ER. Expensive back pain in the butt.

I find that those hot patches really do work and I always have a box in the hall closet.

Sorry to hear about your back as it is horrible and you can't get comfortable either. Hope it's better.

After camp, we met friends and went to the new guinea pig movie (G-Force) that was really cute and funny. I did manage to fall asleep and missed the ending. Then we all went to Chili's for supper and put the 4 girls at another booth which was nice for us 2 grandmas and 2 moms.

I told them about your blog where your name said "I can see Russians from my window". The friends cracked up as they are true Democrats too and dislike Sarah Baby.

TRex said...

I remember when I was in the Scouts as a strapping young man selling flowers door to door on a fund raiser and some sweet wanton young thing clothed in a wet silk bathrobe brought me into her flat and then subjected me to various views of her taut body as she pretended to look for her purse which she apparently stored on the floor or close to.


moscow daily photo said...

I can't even tell you how hilarious this is.


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